Small Wheels, Big Engine

A little ditty I half-plagiarized from Cake while in a meeting this morning. To the Tune of Short Skirt, Long Jacket:

Small Wheels, Big Engine

I want a vespa with a headlight like a diamond
I want a vespa that knows the way home
I want a vespa with tires that peel out
And tailpipes that burn like cigarettes

I want a vespa with the right gear ratios
That's fast, thorough, and sharp as a tack
She's playing in traffic
She's got a small rack
She's touring Smallish City
And picking up slack
I want a vespa with small wheels and a biiiiig engine.

I want a vespa that gets to speed quickly
I want a vespa that stops right quick
This vespa will bring me uninterrupted prosperity
She uses classic styling to cut through red tape

With bright green fenders that shine like justice
And a growl that is dark like tinted glass
She is fast, thorough, and sharp as a tack
She's touring Smallish City
And picking up slack.
I want a vespa with small wheels and a biiiiig engine.

I want a vespa with smooth acceleration
I want a vespa that's been well-maintained
At the TurboPalace we will meet every evening
We'll start right up and drive to the bay.

She is a vespa with a cupholder armrest
She is a vespa that will get me there
I'm changing my bike
To one with a motor
I got her in trade for an old pair of K2's
I want a vespa with small wheels and a biiiiig engine.